"Lessons from Students"

Um, yeah, it's only day 2 for my blog, and I'm already getting post-happy. =) But this is something I wrote a while ago as a facebook note, so I just thought I would "catch up" by posting it here, too. =)

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Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Let me warn you that I am NO writer, and the following will probably be a very poor imitation of a journal entry. =P I just wanted to sort through my thoughts.

Today I taught my two students. A normal, Tuesday, after-school activity. The girls filed out of the car and very calmly walked over and knocked on the door. I answered it and they stood there with their mother, all three smiling charmingly. They came in and the mother and one of them sat delicately on the couch as the other girl brought the music bag over and sat gracefully on the bench and waited patiently for me... HAHAHA!!!!! NOT. I wish, but alas, no. Did I mention that the girls are age 7 and 5?

One girl shows up at the door giggling like crazy and the other takes her time running around outside swinging her music bag. The mother follows both, looking very tired, and making some remark on how it's been a long day. So far, this doesn't bother me. It's a fairly normal occurrence. This doesn't necessarily mean the lesson will be difficult... or will it?

I started with the 5 yr. old. I'll mention that both girls are excellent students overall- smart, perceptive, creative, and quick at catching on to new concepts. But today, I couldn't get her to focus long enough. When she did, for short spurts, she did fine. But it was so hard to keep trying to bring her attention back to the lesson, or even get her to sit on the bench!! But I managed to keep pasted smile on and was able to truthfully tell her she did a good job by the end of the lesson

Then came the 7 yr. old's lesson. She is much more advanced than her sister, and is usually a very good listener. The problem is, she's stubborn, and today she absolutely refused to listen! From the very first piece, she kept saying that it was too hard, too fast, too slow- she just wanted to do it HER way!! At this point, I was on the verge of tears of frustration. I turned off the metronome and told her to work on another piece. I said nothing as she played it and managed to cool down and finish the lesson with some degree of sanity left in me.

After they left, I was still simmering. Irritated thoughts whirled through my head.What was wrong with her? She would not focus. She would not listen. She refused. She was stubborn. She had the potential to move quickly and do amazing things with these pieces, if only she would LISTEN TO WHAT I'M TELLING HER!! Instead of insisting her own way was better!

Then it hit me. I had seen this behavior before. Many, many times- every week of my life, if not every day. Only... I was the student. God was my teacher, my authority. He wants me to grow, to learn, to do great things for Him- and yet, I stubbornly insist on my own way. I don't want to do things that look too hard. I tell Him that. It's just too hard! If it was my way, it would be better! At least, I'D be happier!

But I'm so wrong. Now that I've been put in the teacher position, I see a glimpse of what I'm doing to God when I refuse His way. HE knows the big picture. HE knows that this little annoying exercise He wants me to do is for good. He can use it to build my endurance, stretch my fingers, keep a steady beat as I play. I may not understand what it's for, but He does. He is the teacher, the master planner- and He is SO much wiser than me! What makes me think that MY way is better? If I know that my plan for the student is better than what they have in mind, how much more beautiful will God's plan for my be?

Now I know why God gave me a stressful lesson. He wanted me to feel exactly what I have been doing to Him. And yet, while I get stressed out and feel like giving up on the student, He NEVER gives up on me. He keeps loving me, ever so steadfastly. 

"What if some were unfaithful? Does their faithlessness nullify the faithfulness of God?" -Romans 3:3

He is patient and enduring. He waits for me to return to Him with a willing spirit, ready to learn to walk HIS way.

Isn't it amazing how God can use students to teach you so much?